Chapter Five
After I began accumulating merits for Tian, I once again realized how poor people’s impressions of her were at school.
But then I discovered that although she caused trouble everywhere, she had very few entanglements with girls.
Because Tian was so adept at causing trouble, it seemed that the girls didn’t like her.
Even though they were classmates, the boys could find her mischief endearing (no, impossible), but among the girls, many genuinely disliked her. This was due to the differences between the same sex and the opposite sex. I knew that many boys admired Tian, treating her as an idol. As her brother, I found it hard to understand. Like those girls, I couldn’t accept what Tian did.
However, among them, there was only one girl who didn’t dislike Tian, who was always with her—or rather, always chasing after her.
It seemed that since the second year of middle school, she had been in the same class as Tian, always cleaning up after her. Whether after class or during lunch breaks, she was often by Tian’s side. But whether the two were friends was a bit ambiguous. I had never heard the word “friend” from Tian’s mouth. And Tian wasn’t the type to sit still—she definitely wouldn’t stay obediently in her seat during breaks. Even I found Tian hard to handle; I avoided her as much as possible at school. The fact that she dared to chase after Tian at school made me admire her.
I didn’t think of it until someone else mentioned it, and then I suddenly realized.
That girl was Yang.
Previously, I wasn’t familiar with Yang. After our second—no, third meeting, I finally had a chance to talk to her properly.
As far as I know, Yang is a bit of a busybody. She has long hair that’s slightly wavy, like a cat’s fur—a girl with a gentle appearance who always wears a smile.
It was the first time I met a girl completely opposite to Tian, so fitting of the word “sister,” that I couldn’t help but be impressed by her.
“I went there to look at Tian’s photos… Sorry, is that weird?”
After leaving the Divine Examination Department, we walked together on the way back to the classroom. I hadn’t planned on this, but it somehow turned out this way. Perhaps because when I came out after changing clothes, I saw that Yang was still in the department waiting for me and hadn’t left.
“Because I don’t have any photos of her, I feel like I’m gradually forgetting what she looks like, which is quite scary. So, to avoid forgetting Tian so quickly… so…”
“Ah, I understand, I understand…”
To be honest, for someone like me who can’t wait to forget Tian, Yang’s thoughts are hard to comprehend.
But I knew nothing about Yang; we’d only met twice before, so I couldn’t outright dismiss her.
While trying to be polite, I also became interested in her.
Logically, people at school—especially girls—shouldn’t have a good impression of Tian. As far as I know, she was probably the only girl who would approach Tian.
Even if it was one-sided, she had a good impression of Tian, so after Tian’s death, she would go to that place to look at her photos to remember her, right? I saw earlier that Tian’s photos were blatantly posted on the wall like posters.
For a girl like Tian, who wasn’t popular, this was rare. But Yang seemed very self-conscious. Even though she considered Tian a friend, she felt embarrassed about missing her, now showing an uneasy expression—perhaps feeling like a stalker?
“You’re right; there are indeed photos of Tian there. If you want, why don’t I give you one?”
“Eh?”
Yang’s shoulders shook, showing a startled expression like a frightened deer.
“Ah, I don’t mean anything weird. If you don’t want it, that’s fine… But it’s not anything special…”
“But… wouldn’t that be inappropriate… I’m just an outsider…”
Yang lowered her head gloomily. She’s a well-behaved and sensible girl. Although she considers Tian a friend, she is also very measured.
“Thank you.”
Finally, Yang looked at me with a tearful expression and hurried away. I didn’t know what to say; I could only watch her leave with my mouth open.
“Ah, Yang really likes me! She’s always been following me around; I didn’t expect that even after I died, she’d still be like this!”
After she left, Tian said in my ear.
“Hey, did you have something on her?”
I immediately asked Tian. Others might see me talking to myself again, but I couldn’t care about that now.
“Eh? Why do you say that?”
“Someone like you couldn’t possibly have friends!”
At least I’ve never seen it; so far, I’ve only seen Tian’s lackeys and enemies.
Tian having friends? The biggest joke of the century.
“You must have done something bad or threatened her like you did to me! Did you secretly take photos of her or investigate her family? Anyway, you must have used some dirty means to make her have to be your follower, right?”
“Hehehe, that would be interesting too! But, big brother~ if I wanted to threaten someone, I wouldn’t have to go to so much trouble; I’d just overpower her directly!”
“You… you didn’t commit a crime, did you?”
I was shocked. Although they’re both girls, Tian would do anything.
Tian said nonchalantly,
“How could it be a crime between beautiful girls~ You don’t know, but many people at school want to be my followers.”
“What’s so good about being your follower?”
They’d only get cold stares from others, right?
“Brother, you really have no charm. I’m quite famous!”
“Famous in a bad way!”
Then Tian suddenly said,
“Surprising that you’re so concerned about Yang, brother?”
“How could I? We’ve only met twice. Because last time…”
I couldn’t help but fall silent. Last time, I couldn’t control my emotions, but thinking about it afterward was quite embarrassing.
“Brother, what’s wrong?”
“Nothing,”
I would never admit that I cried for you! It’s a lifelong shame! If Tian knew, the consequences would be unimaginable!
But Tian immediately let out a teasing laugh,
“Hehehe, brother, did you forget? We’re telepathic? You don’t need to say it; as long as it’s about you, I know everything!”
“Wait, what do you mean? You little demon!”
I was careless. Honestly, I didn’t know what telepathy was.
I often talk to myself now, but even without speaking, as long as I think about it, I can communicate with Tian. Maybe whether I want to or not, Tian can know. In other words, all my secrets are laid bare to her.
“You… how much have you seen?”
“Well, at most, I know about your first crush, your preferred type!”
Tian said evasively; she wouldn’t tell the truth.
“Don’t worry, brother, I’m not interested in irrelevant information!”
In other words, she knows a lot of my weaknesses!
“You, stop talking nonsense! I’m not concerned!”
“Confessing without being pressed, brother!”
“So stop peeking!”
I’m not interested in Yang; it’s just that Tian having a friend is such an unprecedented thing, so I’m worried that Yang might have been deceived by Tian.
But I also found it strange. Tian could peek into my mind, so logically, it should be the same in reverse. But so far, I’ve never tried to peek into Tian’s mind… because I didn’t want to have any more entanglements with her.
But thinking about it now, Tian is already dead yet can still telepathically communicate with me. Although Tian says it’s possible, such an outrageous thing should have been investigated long ago.
Alright, let’s try. How does telepathy work? I’ll try to concentrate and attempt to peek into Tian’s mind. Even if I don’t want to see, I want to grasp some of Tian’s weaknesses.
“Whoa!”
But immediately, it felt like being bounced back; my brain buzzed.
I quickly held my forehead and squatted down, feeling unable to stand.
“It hurts!”
What’s going on? My mind felt a bit chaotic, flickering, and I couldn’t see clearly.
Was this Tian’s doing? Why could Tian do such things? It doesn’t matter.
This is definitely Tian’s retaliation. From before, she’s been a dictator who only allows herself to do things.
“Brother, it’s not good to peek into a girl’s mind; you’d better stop.”
“What?! Only you can read me!”
I shouted into the empty corridor. Tian’s response came from the void,
“Hehehe, isn’t this a sister’s privilege~ Of course, it doesn’t work the other way~”
Overbearing, dictatorial, highly skilled, likes to crush others—that’s Tian.
In the days that followed, I continued to circle around Tian. Every day, for Tian’s reincarnation, I would worship her portrait in the morning, write letters commemorating her during class breaks, and even changed my phone’s wallpaper to her.
But even when commemorating her, my heart was full of revenge. When looking at her portrait, all I thought was: You little demon! May you be reincarnated as a caterpillar!
One day, the homeroom teacher suddenly called me to the infirmary. He is a male math teacher, wears glasses, looks a bit silly, and often does clumsy things. But he’s a good person. On the day Tian died, he was the one who stopped me from shaking Tian awake, and he stayed with me until my parents came to school.
He only became the homeroom teacher this year. I wasn’t familiar with him before, but after Tian’s incident, he began to pay special attention to me. I often received his greetings, but that day he suddenly called me to the infirmary. I didn’t know what was going on—probably about Tian again. Homeroom teachers are busy; I actually didn’t want him to worry so much and felt a bit embarrassed.
By the way, there are rumors that he’s dating a language teacher from another class.
“Psychological counseling?”
“Yes,”
“Why?”
As soon as we arrived at the infirmary, the teacher got straight to the point. But I didn’t quite understand what he meant.
“Because several students reported that you’ve been talking to yourself lately.”
“No, I’m not talking to myself…”
I’m talking to my deceased sister… If I say that, I might be transferred from the infirmary to the hospital immediately.
It seems that when telepathically communicating with Tian, I accidentally spoke out loud—after all, I also noticed that many people have been giving me strange looks lately. Since I didn’t have telepathy before, I’m not used to it! The teacher looked at me with concern, making me feel embarrassed.
Since the teacher came to me, it seems the situation is quite serious. How should I cover it up?
Should I just tell the truth? I thought about it—would the teacher believe me? Impossible. If it were me, I wouldn’t believe in telepathic communication with a deceased sister.
“Your sister just passed away, and you might be suffering in ways you can’t express. I don’t want to force you to talk, but whenever you need, you can always come to me. I just wanted to let you know that. I also have a younger sister, and just thinking that she might not be around someday makes me feel unbearable.”
But I’m not that sentimental. Although I don’t know the teacher’s sister, the teacher and I are definitely not the same type.
Sadness? Hahaha, the one who’s still causing trouble in heaven—what is there to be sad about?
On the day she died, the little bit of sadness that emerged has turned to ashes during the recent telepathic communications. Pity is the word farthest from Tian in this world.
“You’re only fourteen, recently in your second year of middle school. You’re still a child. If you have any difficulties, be sure to seek help from adults, okay?”
I want to, but the heavens won’t allow it! Tian can do whatever she wants in heaven, right under the deities’ noses?! The world is hopeless!
The teacher suddenly said,
“Actually, Yang’s situation isn’t very optimistic either.”
“Eh?”
I couldn’t help but look up,
“What’s wrong with Yang?”
The teacher hesitated and adjusted his glasses,
“I’m not Yang’s homeroom teacher, but I do teach math in her class. I heard that lately, Yang has been depressed, her grades have dropped, and she’s not eating much.”
I uttered an “Ah…”
“I can’t tell you too much personal information, but I’m also counseling Yang. Although I don’t have a certification, I’m good at listening to complaints! Since Yang was the first to discover Tian’s death, she seems to have been greatly affected, and she doesn’t sleep well at night. She’s a very responsible person, probably because she has many siblings at home. So she feels a great responsibility for Tian’s death.”
I know that Yang feels guilty about Tian’s death; she previously cried and apologized to me.
Feeling sad for Tian is a waste; she’s still causing trouble in heaven. But even if I think so, Yang can’t let it go.
Perhaps it’s because of guilt that Yang keeps remembering Tian, going to look at her photos, and even, like me, doing things that Tian didn’t finish during her life.
What should I do? As Tian’s brother, I want to tell her it’s not your fault; Tian’s death isn’t because of you. She brought it upon herself! But I feel such shallow comfort wouldn’t work.
She was the first to discover Tian’s death, which proves she was close to Tian. Although I never heard about her from Tian, and only occasionally saw her following Tian at school, she must be very sad. Her feelings are unimaginable to someone like me who avoided Tian at school.
“I think she’s overthinking; Tian’s death has nothing to do with her.”
I sighed in a somewhat worldly tone. The teacher replied calmly,
“Yes, but people aren’t so easily detached, so psychological counseling is needed.”
“Teacher, you’re not a psychologist either, right?”
“That’s true… How about this? Since both of you are experiencing the same pain, why not try talking to each other?”
“Eh? With me?”
“Yes, I think you should have a lot in common. What do you think of Yang?”
I’m different from Yang. Although it seems like I’m doing things to remember Tian, I’m actually being forced to; I’m doing it reluctantly.
I’ve only talked to Yang twice and vaguely remember her crying face.
Long hair, small face, gentle eyes soaked with tears… It makes one feel a bit sad.
“Well, she’s a well-behaved girl much more obedient than Tian. She seems too sensible; if Tian were one-tenth as good as her, it would be great.”
“Brother, so you like that type?”
Suddenly, Tian interjected via telepathy.
“Shut up.”
I couldn’t help but retort, and the teacher across from me showed a surprised expression.
“Ah, no, I wasn’t talking about you, teacher.”
“Is that so? Anyway, if there’s any problem, I can take responsibility. Why don’t you try talking to her?”
The teacher looked at me with a somewhat serious gaze, probably suspecting that I’m also saddened by Tian’s death.
I think explaining would only make it worse, so I could only touch my nose and nod.
“Okay.”
Yang is feeling guilty over Tian’s death, so counseling her is my responsibility as Tian’s brother.
Honestly, during the process of cleaning up after Tian, I heard a lot about Yang, and I was a bit concerned about her.
“Brother, Yang is a good person, you know?”
Even Tian appeared, whispering in my ear via telepathy.
“Someone you call a good person must be Mother Teresa or perhaps a saint!”
“Yes, yes. Anyway, I’m a troublemaker, and Yang sometimes advised me, sometimes apologized to others on my behalf, and sometimes even got scolded by others for me!”
Tian’s tone had no trace of remorse, but I wasn’t as shameless as her, so I felt more and more sorry for Yang as I listened.
“It’s not that I don’t feel bad.”
“Stop beating around the bush; just say it straight—you did it on purpose!”
“Hehehe~ but I want to live freely! I want to treat everything around me as toys!”
“You’d better just go to hell.”
But Tian changed her tone and suddenly said somewhat sadly,
“Brother, please help Yang, okay?”
“What are you plotting?”
It’s definitely not good when this sister suddenly says something that seems considerate.
And lately, she seems to be subtly bringing up Yang around me, probably because she noticed I’m paying attention to her and wants to see me make a fool of myself?
But she wouldn’t admit it and continued in a sincere yet fake tone,
“Since we’re accumulating merits, of course, we should help Yang if she’s in trouble!”
Isn’t her trouble caused by you?! Don’t say it so sanctimoniously! And it’s not ‘we’! I’m also your victim, little sister!
“Helping Yang can accumulate merits and compensate for the trouble caused to her. Honestly, I feel a bit sorry~ Hehehe~”
No, not at all. You just want me to toil for you, right?
“Besides, you seem to care about Yang, don’t you?”
Tian suddenly said softly. This girl really just wants to see me embarrassed.
“Ha! I don’t care at all!”
“Here we go again. I can telepathically connect with you, brother; you can’t hide from me!”
I couldn’t help gritting my teeth. This one-way telepathy is too disadvantageous.
“Since my death, you’ve been thinking about Yang. Why not take this opportunity to pursue her?”
“Get lost!!!”
Unconsciously, I stood up from my chair, only to realize that the surroundings were silent.
“Student Di, it’s class time now; please sit down.”
“…Okay.”
Before I knew it, I was standing alone in the middle of the classroom, talking to myself again. Under the tolerant gazes around me, I sat down and buried my head on the desk.
Tian seemed like a child caught after a prank, maliciously silent, no longer telepathically communicating with me.
So I had no chance to refute her and could only digest it by myself at my seat.
How could I have any feelings for Yang! That’s impossible! And after knowing that Yang was Tian’s friend, I just felt sorry for her.
We’re just unfamiliar classmates; we’ve only met three times so far, spending less than half an hour together!
Maybe it’s because each encounter was too special that I care a little, but it’s just a psychological effect like the suspension bridge effect. And all these things were caused by Tian, and she still has the nerve to tease me. No, she’s the kind of person who enjoys others’ misfortune!
Tian said to help Yang, and I agree that Yang, who always worried about Tian and felt guilty for not discovering Tian’s death earlier, should be helped. But this is absolutely not out of personal feelings.
But even if I say that, Tian would definitely mock me. Although Tian has no sense for love, she loves to see others make fools of themselves.
It’s just that, as fellow victims of Tian, I feel sympathetic towards her.
That day, the tears she shed while crying for Tian at the doorway were so gentle. It made me realize that I could never be as tender as she is. But I am still very grateful to her for being willing to weep for Tian.
